What is Personal Branding And Why Does It Matter?
I want to admit, that I have taken personal branding for granted and I wish I knew about it when I was younger. I will open my heart out for you all in this article and share my personal experience about personal branding and how it can make or break your career/relationships. How it can change the image of how people see you and approach you. There are so many elements personal branding has that builds an entire personality and that personality is the “product” that you sell in the market for everything and people bid on it. We all say it doesn’t matter what people think of you and I agree. However, up to an extent, it does affect us because humans are social beings and we always keep seeking our tribe professionally and personally where we want to belong. Hence, personal branding can help you in long run to find/build, chase/attract your tribe, because we attract who we are.
In simple words, personal branding is when you create a brand of your own personality. There are different aspects that help you create your personal brand. Let’s start with…
Appearance: I talk about styling a lot because your appearance is the first thing anyone notices about you and we all know that people treat you differently according to how you look. The way you carry yourself says how much respect you have for yourself and obviously, that earns you other’s respect too. You need to imagine what kind of circle you want to surround yourself with, what kind of man you want to marry, what kind of work you would want to be known for and show up as that woman every damn day. As you know from my previous blogs, I am a big fan of elegance and femininity. Today when every woman is removing their clothes to get attention and giving men the free show, I want you to stand out by choosing elegant clothing. It is possible to attract men in a sensual way and bosses in an assertive way by choosing the right clothing that makes you look very attractive and not vulgar. People will respect you and will take you seriously. Start building your personal brand with appearance first because that’s the easiest part. The tough part is personality.
For decent, elegant and appropriate office outfit ideas, please read my blog about the same.
Personality: Let me tell you what type of personality is most loved and effective to have a successful life as a woman, “The Calm One”. Being calm and relaxed is a very feminine quality that will work for you like a magnet. Men would want to get close to you and your bosses would want to promote you because it shows that you can keep your cool under pressure. Responding calmly to an aggressive brain is a very effective quality that is admired for ages and it is easier for women to achieve that relaxed aura because hormonally we are built that way. In today’s world, we are being taught to admire masculine energy that teaches us not to cry, swallow our emotions, ignore our sixth sense and instincts because the world asks for logic. My ladies, the more you trust and respect your sixth sense the more you will realise that it is way more accurate than any logic. Of course, at the workplace you need logic but to deal with people anywhere, the sixth sense is your best friend. Speak straight whatever you are feeling and you will see people listening to you and respect you more than ever. They will find you logical if you speak from your heart even if you are at work and this quality is golden in relationships.
How it works in relationships: I will be able to explain this with my personal example. In India, parents have a different set of expectations from a girl child. They wanted me to get married right after I finish college, they never wanted me to leave the house and live alone. They were not able to understand that why having a career and financial independence is important to me. I was sad about the fact that I was always an odd one out in my family whose mind they were not able to read. I used to do things to fit in and made a fool out of myself many times. I realised much later in life that, if you are meant to stand out, take it as a blessing and don’t try to fit in. I started doing things that kill unnecessary expectations of others each time. I created my personal brand in my family that nobody expects anything from and now when I do things for them, it pleases them more than I intend to (haha). I am high calibre woman just like all of you are and I don’t fulfil unreasonable requests made by others. Maybe that still makes me moody, stubborn and snobbish in their perspective but for me, I am not moody but honest with my feelings, I am not stubborn, I Standup for what I believe in, I am not snobbish, I choose to be with people who add value to my life. I am more than okay with people having different perspectives on the same things, that again makes me a diplomat but you gotta choose your battles. So I am okay being a diplomat rather than fighting who is right and who is wrong. I choose to be this way and this type of personal brand helps me get along with affluent and successful people. One thing I highly recommend to all my beautiful ladies is that as a woman your personal brand should never be desperate. The more you will believe in yourself and your decisions the more relaxed you will be. Let’s talk about romantic relationships now. Imagine you went out on few dates, your conversations are intimate and chemistry is magnetic. Suddenly he starts to pull away and you want to know why so you wait for few days and now you want to call him and check what’s wrong. Now at this very moment, you are going to build your personal brand in front of that man. You can go ahead and desperately starts calling him and texting him multiple times. Or you can text him just once that, “Hi, It’s been a week I haven’t heard from you, I hope everything is okay.” Now this message is more than enough to show that you are interested, and trust me men can feel it. Once he comes back with a response, his reply will decide if you will take this forward or not, or how you will take this forward. His reply is giving away his personal brand if he is player or a keeper. If his efforts and responses are not satisfying you, decreasing your efforts with a sweet response is a way to go. A high calibre woman never responds to low efforts.
When you start complaining to him about that one week of gap more than you should, that shows you are weak with your decisions. You might end up going out with him in a romantic way again and that is against your standards and that is what makes you mad at him. If you are not going to go out with him again, why bother wasting your energy on him. Be sweet like a pie that will attract him towards you and then you stick up for your standards so he knows what he has to do to win you. Once you achieve a chilled-out persona with standards, men would be attracted to you for the long term and that’s the kind of personal brand you want to be associated with, in your personal relationships.
Examples: We have many examples to prove that personal branding has taken normal middle-class women to great heights in their careers and relationships. You can find many examples around you where you really admire someone the way they carry themselves. Deepika Padukone, Priyanka Chopra, Kate Middleton, Meghan Markle, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan and many more. These women have accomplished great success in their careers and got loving partners in their personal life. If you follow their life journey, they did not come from glamourous backgrounds, in fact, they lived a normal life but the way you carry yourself helps you a lot. If you don’t feel confidant someday, fake it till you make it. I am especially inspired by the story of Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy, she started as a normal sales girl but her personal style and outgoing personality helped her the long way. Follow these women’s life journeys and many other women that you feel inspired by and you will see they carried themselves in a certain way that benefited them in long run. It doesn’t matter where you come from if you have good manners, elegant and classy style, high standards, relaxed personality and feminine energy oozing out of you, then my girl you are already halfway to your success.